Playing without a Dungeon Master

I am a long time DM. I have run numerous campaigns across more than ten years. It’s been fun for sure. But as many a Dungeon Master can attest to, all too often the weight of running a game falls on their shoulders. To be sure, being a Dungeon Master isn’t something everybody can do. It is a demanding job, even with a premade adventure. But a few of us have wondered if it was possible to run without a Dungeon Master at all? In my own searching, I’ve found that it is possible, but not without some form of supplement material and neither are without their flaws. To my knowledge, there are only two such supplements that do what I want: run a game for me. These are the Mythic Game Master Emulator and the 4th Edition Dungeon Master’s Guide.

The Mythic Game Master Emulator is actually an off-shoot of an entire role playing game that I haven’t explored beyond knowing that it is a “rules light” role playing game. Which is fine, all we need is the emulator. So how does this emulator work? Very randomly. To grossly oversimplify it, it’s like you’re making a magic 8-ball and a game of Pictionary run your game. Again, that’s a gross oversimplification, and I can vouch that the Mythic Game Master Emulator DOES work. The jist is you start an adventure by rolling on some charts and tables, ask yes/no questions to better define things, and use logic to guide and dictate exactly what’s going on. You, all alone or with a group, decide what’s just happened. Mythic just gives you the pieces. If it is just you, then the events are as you interpret them. If you’re in a group, it goes to whatever the majority of you agree on. This cycle of questions and answers goes on until you resolve your threads (your quests). Of course, nothing stops you from taking a break to come back later. One of the things I don’t feel Mythic reiterates well is that your character(s) should start the game with a small handful of known NPCs (parents, friends, bosses) and personal Threads. That is, if you’re starting truly randomly. It draws on those details to start your quest. It takes time and some getting used to, so it isn’t for everyone, but I like using it.

The second option is from the 4th Edition Dungeon Master’s Guide, of all places. I know 4e doesn’t have a good reputation, but the 4e DMG was very well written and has one jewel of a rule on playing without a DM, you just have to go to the trouble of adapting it to another edition. It is very simple too. Make a deck of monsters, roll up a random dungeon, and draw one monster from the deck per player in the party when someone enters a room. One card is the “boss” monster and the adventure is over once you defeat it. The caveat is that you shuffle it into the deck after the first time you find it. Only after the second time you draw it does it stand its ground. The rules set recommends that you either designate one player to control the monsters or you decide as a group how the monsters act. When adapting it to another edition, the decks you make will each be tailored to an individual level. Most of the monsters should be at a ratio of 1-to-1 with an average character of the given level, with a few stronger and weaker monsters thrown in for good measure. I haven’t used this as much as I have Mythic, but I have used it in 5e and I can confirm the idea holds up. If nothing else, it is an excellent way to get with some friends to test drive recent Unearthed Arcana material. And that’s nothing to scoff at.

With prospects like these, playing D&D without a DM is doable and enjoyable. If I were to recommend one over the other, I would say go with Mythic, however, it’s absolutely worth the effort to master both. I will try using the two in tandem when I can, I just need the time. Until then, keep trying to hit the endgame, folks.

-The Clark Side

D&D Playbook: Master 10 D&D Combat Improvments!

Do your monsters bore you? Are your fights uninteresting? I’ve run into this problem. It is an issue plaguing many DMs. However, it is easy to fix. I stopped doing the minimum. I made a list of criteria, looked at each encounter, and decided if it was missing things from that. So take a page from my book, and see 10 ideas to improve combat in D&D (or another game).

1. Terrain

I’ve overlooked terrain for years. It’s such a simple thing, yet easy to forget. It isn’t even hard to fix. Your encounters improve dramatically when there’s cover, difficult terrain, and varying elevation. I wouldn’t use all of them all the time. Just one or two for “common” encounters. More climactic encounters benefit from two to three.

2. Numbers

I include more weaker monsters in my encounters than stronger ones. I do, however, know what each of the creatures does very well beforehand. Not knowing this slows the game down. The up-side is your players have more options on what to attack and feel more powerful mowing them down. For 1st level characters especially, reconsider those CR 0s and some CR 1/8ths.

3. Traps

Sadly, I’m bad about not using enough traps throughout my games. Adding them into an encounter makes for another enjoyable level of danger. It is especially fun if the party can hijack the trap instead of just disarming it. If it makes sense, that might be a feature of the trap or it might be a reward for a high roll.

4. Hazards

Surely, hazards are just natural traps, right? Nope. Hazards can function like traps, but there’s not as much a party can do about them. Toxic swamp gas? Rock slides? Cacti? Fungi? Yup, they’re all valid choices. Still, I take a “free-for-all” approach to them. That way, the party or monsters can use them.

5. Goals

Say, do all battles have to be about one side dying? No, they can (and should) have other victory conditions. Now, a fight with an evil priest might be about taking his scepter. Now, a fight with some assassins is a chase to keep them from the king. See, it all goes a long way towards a better game.

6. Skills

Huh, skills? Yes, skills! Perhaps you expected skills to stay with traps or hazards? No, they can be with monsters too. And, they can go beyond just athletics or stealth checks. For instance, one of my adventures has a goblin who’s sewn stolen gold into his clothes. Therefore, a Dexterity (sleight of hand) check (or a critical hit) frees the gold. As a result, it turns his masters against him. Admittedly, this is harder to do. In short, think about a creature’s flaws that a skill could take advantage of.

7. New Abilities

Yup, giving monsters new abilities is a decent way to spice things up. Consequently, its novelty is fleeting, so use them sparingly. A cockatrice that sets people on fire instead of petrifying them, perhaps. A blindfolded beholder (or one that willingly had its eyes sewn shut) with psionic power. Sand sahaugin with sand sharks. Rust elementals. As a result, that means more work. So, aim for reskinning and tweaking if you can’t make new monsters.

8. Rivals

Rival battles can mix things up and be used multiple times (sparingly). Another adventuring party competing for the same goal might offer to have a sort of formal duel. This rival isn’t meant to be antagonistic, per say. They fight until they yield (maybe even quickly with a skill check) or are knocked unconscious. Rivals that are villains need to be built like a boss monster: several ways of escaping (invisibility, smoke bomb, teleports, straight up speed, etc), lots of HP, and when their hit points reach half or less, they make their escape.

9. Gauntlets

No, not the metal boxing gloves. Consecutive battles! This is a risky option, and it’s easy to mess up. If your battles weren’t interesting before, just adding more of the same makes things much worse. String several easier encounters together. Of course, heed my previous advice. Perhaps kobolds pepper a party with slings, lure the party into a trap, and all charge back into the fray with their fledgling dragon in toe. Hobgoblins soldiers block a party, their siege weapon or beast slowly lurches in behind them, and then their cavalry appears to help turn the tide. Stage encounters after the party has finished (or mostly finished) their current problem. Otherwise, you’ll kill them.

10. Power Trip

Seriously! Sometimes, you just throw woefully weaker creatures at your party. It’s especially satisfying if the dead-men-walking are arrogant and think highly of themselves. Use these at higher levels and the least often.

And that is how you do it. 10 tips to improve D&D combat. Thought, much of this translates well to any game with combat. Regardless of your game, when you’re stuck in a rut, take a page from my book!

-The Clark Side

Take a Page from my Book: 10 Best D&D Spell Scrolls

Dungeons Masters, have you ever wanted to fill up a hoard, but had no clue what to put in it? Did you stare at the pages and nothing jumped out at you? Sure, you’re adding in more potions now, but it still isn’t quite varied enough. What do you do? What else is there? Let me reintroduce you to spell scrolls.

Just like with potions, scrolls don’t come up much. Maybe it’s because they’re too niche? Maybe players don’t think much about having one extra use of a spell, especially with at-will magic? Whatever the case, you didn’t give them much thought before. Now’s the time to end that, so take a page from my book and see the 10 best spell scrolls in Dungeons and Dragons.

Spell Scroll of Mending
A cantrip spell scroll? Really? Yes, really! Part of the point of scrolls is their utility, and the mending cantrip is just that. Utility! Few spellcasters pick mending, they just have other priorities. Having scrolls at the ready can be very useful! Rust monster chewed clean through your sword? Spell scroll of mending! Wagon wheel broke in the middle of the road? Spell scroll of mending! What’s more, almost all (primary) spellcasters can use it, so drop it in a low level hoard.
Spell Scroll of Feather Fall
Feather fall is another one of those highly utilitarian spells. You’d rather have it and not need it, than need it and not have it. Being able to survive a lethal fall with the grace of a cloud is fun. Though, it’s a mistake to think of it only for emergencies. It’s also handy if you willingly jump off some dangerous heights. When you need to get down, it beats the stairs by a mile.
Spell Scroll of Enhance Ability
Advantage is easy to get in 5th Edition D&D. There’s the Help action, some people still use Flanking, the Inspiration mechanics, etc. The easiest way is to just have enhance ability. Simply helping a guy succeed on check feels great and avoids setbacks, so a scroll of it is worth having.
Spell Scroll of Revivify
Always have ways to revive a dead character. Always.
Spell Scroll of Greater Invisibility
Most invisibility effects are temporary, and that’s fine. Greater invisibility throws most of that out the window. Its invisibility effect can only work on one creature, but won’t end if the recipient attacks or casts a spell. Suddenly, you go from “I can set up some ambushes really well” to “I come out of most battles unscathed.” This makes it a welcome treasure in any spellcaster’s back pocket.
Spell Scroll of Scrying
Being able to check up on people and places is immensely useful. Scrying on your own familiar or stealthy ally broadens your scouting abilities considerably.
Spell Scroll of Otiluke’s Freezing Sphere
Finally, 6th-Level spells are starting to get strong and scarce. Casters don’t learn or cast as many of these stronger spells. The competition for magic only gets fiercer from here on out. I added Otiluke’s freezing sphere to this list because it is both an offensive spell and a utility spell. It isn’t really worth a spell slot. It is worth casting from a scroll, using the sphere function, and then handing it over to a slinger.
Spell Scroll of Finger of Death
Across all tables, finger of death is fun. Who doesn’t like simultaneously killing and zombifying a creature? Even if they know this spell, players are happy to have more spell scrolls of finger of death.
Spell Scroll of Power Word Stun
Many say the “power word” spells are bad. There’s truth to this. However, don’t be fooled. Power word stun is worth having, at least as a scroll. Stunning targets, sometimes ones that have been softened up, can turn the tide in a battle.
Spell Scroll of Foresight
At the pinnacle of spells, I have a hard time not recommending meteor swarm, time stop, or wish. But, of all the spells at 9th level, foresight is the most accessible. That makes it the best spell as treasure by default. Nearly every major spellcasting class can cast foresight, they just don’t make it a priority. But that’s fine, it’s a fantastic spell, it’s just that the competition is just that fierce now. Regardless, many a player will be happy to have a spell scroll of foresight in the next hoard they claim.

My list is done. The best 10 spell scrolls for treasure. That said, almost any spell works. In fact, you should also choose unusual spells to make into spell scrolls. For example, players often like casting low level spells with higher slots, but can feel guilty about not being optimal. So do it for them! Drop in some spell scrolls of magic missile or spiritual weapon or thunderwave, just set at a higher level. In particular, I suggest using spell scrolls as the players’ chance to try out new spells. Color spray has yet to see play at my table. Now it’ll find its way into a treasure hoard. So take a page from my book, use spell scrolls in your treasure hoards!

-The Clark Side

Take a Page from my Book: 10 Best D&D Potions

It sucks when players don’t like their loot, doesn’t it? As Dungeons and Dragons players adventure and quest, they invariably gain more magical gear. It’s exciting! Eventually, though, they’ll get something nobody’s interested in having. Maybe that’s just how things turned out? Maybe you thought it’d be neat for them to find a magic pick ax, but nobody liked it. It sucks. It isn’t the end of the world (most of the time), but can it be avoided? Yes! Use potions! Potions are expendable, so their effects won’t upend your game. What’s more, potions take far less time to create than any other magic item. In a fantasy world, it makes total sense for creatures to spend their time brewing things. So take a page from my book, consider these 10 potions when dolling out treasure.

Potion of Animal Friendship
The potion of animal friendship is a wonderful little drink. Chug it down and for an hour, the drinker can cast the spell animal friendship as much as they like. This is a handy spell to have on hand. Beasts are more prevalent than one might think. Turning a goblin’s rats or wolves against them is fun. Getting a bear to understand you mean it (and her cubs) no harm is great. Riding a giant ape or t-rex into a final battle is priceless. It’s never a bad idea to have one or two on hand.
Potion of Growth
The potion of growth is very fun item. It’s strength is in its simplicity: drink the potion, grow big. More specifically, you gain the “enlarge” portion of the enlarge/reduce spell. The main selling point here, though is that you don’t need to concentrate. Getting a handful of these for your weapon oriented characters is a swell way to make them feel stronger and put more of them between you and the monsters. And the more attacks they make, the more their damage adds up.
Potion of Resistance
The potion of resistance is an item the party might not appreciate only having one of, but a variety of. This potion simply confers resistance to a certain damage type to its drinker. You might have a potion of fire resistance or a potion of cold resistance or a potion of necrotic resistance. The important thing to remember is to use it as a feature of your adventures. What I mean by that is if you plan on throwing shocker lizards, behirs, and blue dragons at your party soon, then them finding potions of lightning resistance is their clue as to what’s ahead.
Potion of Fire Breath
Now we’re getting into my personal favorite potion. The potion of fire breath! This potion does just what it says on the tin. You drink it and, up to three times within an hour, you can breath fire as a bonus action. The damage is 4d6 fire damage vs the target’s Dexterity saving throw for half damage. That’s a fair bit, especially when you’re low level. And, sure, it is fire damage, which has a plethora of creatures resistant to it (later on). But it’s still a great item, and literally a blast to use!
Potion of Healing
Potions of healing are arguably the best potion in the game. The lowest level is of common rarity and they’re the easiest to make. The stronger ones scale well and can shore up lost health and spent spell slots in the middle of a dungeon. You can almost never go wrong with a potion of healing. Just don’t mistake it for a potion of poison, since the two appear identical. But, then again, that’s kind of the point of the potion of poison: fool you into drinking it.
Potion of Invulnerability
The potion of invulnerability really sounds too good to be true. For one minute, the drinker gains resistance to all damage. All damage. You can survive falls from the loftiest of heights. You can stand up to a dragon’s breath, bite, claws, and tail. You can’t get eaten by a Tarrasque, though. You’re going be stuck in there for more than a minute and get melted by stomach acid. But still, that’s a lot of other great stuff!
Potion of Speed
Next up, we have one of the absolute best potions in the game. The potion of speed. Like the potion of animal friendship and the potion of growth, the potion of speed is a spell in liquid form. Haste. Haste is one of the best spells in the whole game and gets to be even more fun as a potion. Like it’s counterparts, it doesn’t require concentration. Chug it and gain doubled speed, +2 to AC, advantage on Dexterity saving throws, and an extra action every turn! Granted, there’s some limitations on the action, but you can still do a lot including make one Attack. That adds up very quickly. And who doesn’t love running all over the place?
Potion of Invisibility
This potion makes you invisible for an hour. Making your way around a dungeon totally invisibly allows for a lot of information gathering. This potion is less useful for prolonged combat, as it ends when you attack or cast a spell. However, for ambushes or quick escapes, it’s a great choice.
Potion of Flying
Folks, the stronger your characters get, the more important it is to have many ways of moving about. If you can’t fly, then a dragon, in the open, can swoop in, strafe with its breath weapon, and fly back off. You’re basically a sitting duck. There are other ways of flying. Some much more accessible than a potion of this rarity. Those things, however, can burn. I’d rather not have my broom turn to ash as I fly on it while the dragon breaths at me. No, I think I’m going to drink this potion and enjoy chasing after it without worrying about falling to my death. Because if a dragon drops me to 0 hit points, I’m already dead anyway.
Potion of Giant Strength
The various potions of giant strength are easily some of the best items in the game. With but one good gulp, you gain inhuman, monstrous, nearly unrivaled levels of strength. Albeit temporarily. Suddenly, you can wrestle a demon into submission. Suddenly, you can crush coal into diamonds. Suddenly, you can kick a can all the way around the world and catch it yourself. Well, maybe not that last one, but I wouldn’t rule it out. This is fantasy after all. And best of all, the varieties are of different rarities and strength, so it’s very satisfying to have a bunch.

And that, folks, is the list. They’re in no particular order and by no means should you limit yourself to just these. Your party might enjoy some of the others too. These are just fantastic choices to round out your treasure with. So take a page from my book, fill your adventures with more potions.

-The Clark Side

Playing to the Hilt: Orcs

Dungeons and Dragons, even fantasy in general, has few villains more iconic than the classic orc. If goblins are the weak fodder, orcs are the monstrous marauders bent on pillaging and plundering. Recent trends have shown an effort to make orcs grow beyond that standard. That’s all well and good, namely for newer settings. However, I say it’s better to really understand what orcs are before you go making them hippies. And, yes, there is more to orcs than just savagery. And by the end of this post, you’ll see exactly what I’m talking about. Because if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing it to the hilt!

Probably the most unexpected quality of orcs is their faith. Orcs follow the infamously powerful and wrathful Gruumsh, the one-eyed god. Some stories hold that when Gruumsh was trying to pick a place for his creations to roam, the other gods objected. Their objections reached the point where Gruumsh lost his patience and chose the wild places of the world for his children. Further, he instructed them to procreate and take the land they were denied away from the weaklings who cannot hold it. This is the underlying conflict every orc must contend with. A divine calling to destroy and subjugate. They can fight this calling, of course, but most aren’t bright enough to do so. What’s more, despite being an evil deity, Gruumsh actually cares for his orcs, in his own way. Should they fall in a fight, their souls are secured as part of his unholy army to fight beside him forever. Some might say this is uncharacteristic of a chaotic evil deity. That perspective on alignment reduces it to inflexible rules rather than the general outlook, attitudes, and behaviors of a free-willed creature. However, that’s another topic entirely. The point is the orcs have a good reason to follow their wicked god. They’re always on the lookout for omens and signs from Gruumsh that suggest a course of action. The easiest way to show this is to say you look for any omens in the open while traveling. You might even stop and ask the party cleric to cast such a spell for guidance, or go out of your way to gain these abilities yourself. Your orc could go in the opposite direction, recognizing that Gruumsh isn’t always a good influence and be very distrustful of magic in general. Picking a class and/or background related to divinity or battle is a solid start in any event. As for adventuring motivation, it’s quite possible you saw an omen telling you to carve out your own path of destruction. Maybe your path will ultimately lead to a more suitable place for the orcs to live.

So what exactly did Gruumsh put into his creations anyway? Well, if half-orcs have “diluted” aggression, then pure bred orcs are aggression personified. Orcs are very physical creatures. They need to strengthen their muscles, run through the wild, hunt, destroy, and fight, fight, fight! Orcs confined to a smaller place build up this aggression to the point that they may as well be an animal. No wonder Gruumsh tells them to die in battle. Their traits, particularly in 5th edition Dungeons and Dragons, reflect this, as they are able to move in double time (provided they’ve moved closer to an enemy when they stop). The best way to show this off is to come across as something of a fitness fanatics, only in a fantasy context. Brag about the buckets of water you can heft, the stones you can throw. Even when talking about something else, say you’re doing bicep curls with a rock as you converse. Strength, in one form or another, should accent your life. That said, it goes much deeper than just showing you’re fit. Strength, being their key ability, is of the utmost importance to orcs. Orcs who are runts, orcs who are sickly, orcs who are old, all risk some form of exile from their tribe. This is actually an excellent excuse for an orc to adventure. If you build your orc to be a rogue or a non-divine spellcaster, you can easily say you left your tribe because you were weak. Do you care about strength? Do you want revenge or are you going to try and prove power isn’t about just raw strength? All excellent questions to be answered for an orcish character. Even if you are strong, you could say that a rival of equal or greater strength ousted you and your tribe will feel your wrath. You just need a little help getting it done. Bingo! You have a common enemy with the rest of your party.

Taking the influence of the divine and the influence of the body into account, how does that shape their minds? The truth is, the majority of orcs are just plain dumb. There’s not much to shape. The surges of adrenaline and the call to battle shape them into their monstrous reputation. This, however, makes the ones who do have better cognition that much more notable. They can aim their aggression themselves. Imagine your mind is burning with fury. Inner voices are silent. There is only recognition, recognition of your surroundings, recognition of yourself, and recognition of your target. Nothing else matters, nothing else is expressed in verbal ways. Pure instinct is your guide and nothing will stand between you and your target, or you’ll die trying. This is how it is for most orcs in the heat of battle. Focus and fury. For a smarter orc, they just pick their own goal and apply the same aggressive instincts towards it.

Orcs are indeed the monstrous humanoids of myth. They’re not limited to that, yes, but what they are and what they represent is necessary. More importantly, it can be amazing to play. For all the same reasons someone wants to play a barbarian, you could want to play an orc. For them, they are guided by divinity, fueled by their fury, and honed by their aversion to weakness. Dangerous for certain, often used for evil, but not a terrible lifestyle in and of itself. The orcs are far more complicated than what they appear to be. So the next time you make a character, and you see the orc, remember this post. Because if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing it to the hilt!

Playing to the Hilt: Goblins

Among fantasy, and Dungeons and Dragons specifically, goblins have played a simple role. Namely, they’re fodder for fledgling adventurers to cut through. They are the mean, crude, destructive little creatures and most common folk would be far happier without them. And yet, there’s a strong appeal to them. A sort of mischievousness is implicit in them. Whether you’re a player, dungeon master, or a fantasy writer, read on. Learn what it really means to play a goblin. Because if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing it to the hilt!

The lifestyles of goblins are very telling. Whoever’s on top calls the shots, everyone else below him is subservient at best or a slave at worst. The hierarchy is fairly simple. The weakest class, the pariahs, are on the bottom and do menial tasks. They have the least respect and are little more than slaves who clean and mine. Gatherers are next. Their role is to supply food with their simplistic farming, foraging, and stealing from others. They get to bully pariahs. Third are the hunters. If they have even modest skill with a weapon, they can fight. That’s all it really takes to become one, however, they are expected to stand and fight when the time calls for it. The top of the totem pole is occupied by the lashers. Lashers are any goblins who can perform a spell. Any spell is fine. Any magic is fine. Alternatively, a goblin with a broad range of skills, such as smelting, strategy, theology, etc, can also claim status as a lasher. The only one higher than a lasher is a boss. Most often this is simply a highly experienced veteran of combat or a master strategist, at least by goblin standards. If you came from a goblin tribe, and it’s likely you did, deciding which caste you were a part of and why you left answers several questions. But why leave the relatively good life of a lasher? Status symbols. Goblins love symbols of their status. An exotic beast, a magic item, etc. Anything that let’s you lord over others. Everyone else, especially the pariahs, would jump at the chance to leave their life behind to gather slaves and power. You might be resentful of the treatment you’ve experienced and think you’re better off on your own. No matter which caste you came from, try to fawn over the strongest looking party member and berate NPCs who seem timid. Additionally, consider having some reverence for the spellcasters. A monk, however, should absolutely baffle you. They don’t look as strong, eat a strange diet, and go unarmed. Yet somehow, they strike with a force rivaling and even surpassing weaponry. It makes no sense! Then again, neither does magic, leaving you back at square one. Placate the strong and punish the weak. That is the life of a goblin.

Now, let’s get into the good stuff: mischief. Goblins are well known for tormenting other creatures. Found a halfling in the road? Offer him safe passage, if he tries your pie. Sure it’s a mud pie, but you won’t tell him that. Make him eat the whole thing, it’ll be a great way to kill time. See a kid getting bullied? Offer to teach him “booyahg” (goblin magic) so he can get his revenge. Now you’ve got back-to-back beat downs to watch that afternoon, because you didn’t really teach him anything. Want a steady income? Be a ratcatcher. Kill all those nasty rats in town. Nevermind that you let them lose yourself, you got to be cruel to two entities at once! The townsfolk and the rats! As a player, you’ll have to be careful about how far you go. Bullying is a sensitive subject. Balance it between being mean, funny, and harmless. Shave a familiar’s fur or ranger’s pet so it says “goblin wuz heer”. If they ask you to fix it, finish shaving the pet completely. All better! Alternatively, add crudely written, nonsensical books to the wizard’s or cleric’s library without telling them. Their confused expressions will be priceless. Strive for “funny” more than anything else, but never, ever go too far or do anything causing harm. Other than that, have fun!

Finally, the mindset of the goblin. Goblins are very aware of how weak they are. Because their own deity was beaten by another, because they too are bullied by bigger creatures, and because magic is so distantly beyond their reach, goblins are frequently resentful. That’s why they cherish being in charge and why they harass creatures beneath them. Their lives are largely short-lived, miserable experiences. They eke out whatever fun they can, whenever they can. This pitiable train of thought can be shown through enthusiasm, strangely enough. Be the first to suggest drinking and other leisurely activities when in town. Focus on gambling, carousing, and criminal activities with your downtime. Balking at an honest day’s work and cutting corners to get a job finished is a plausible way to support this. Your other reasons for adventuring might stem from this. A fool and his money are soon parted, after all. But, don’t rule out such things completely. Do constructive things when you want to emphasize either a change in your goblin’s perspective or when you’re preparing for a particularly dangerous adventure. That way it means something, since you established living large was valuable and have now found something truly more valuable.

Goblins live in a world that rises far above them. This world seems insurmountably tall with creatures just as big. Though they are small and very, very angry about their status, they can also have a playful side, albeit a cruel one. Goblins aren’t only their anger. Their need to cause a ruckus and enjoy the fun things in life can add a facet of carpe diem to your game. Keeping it in check might be another matter, but that’s also part of the fun. So the next time you think about a character and you see a goblin, remember this post. Because if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing it to the hilt!

-The Clark Side

Cutting Words: a Dungeons and Dragons Movie Review

Amongst the history of film, there are numerous fantasy icons and classics. The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Harry Potter, Jason and the Argonauts, Conan the Barbarian, the Wizard of Oz. The list goes on. Among gaming, Dungeons and Dragons is the king of fantasy. Naturally, its many imaginative locations and creatures would be a perfect fit for a fantasy feature with a thrilling narrative. You would think so, but it’s much more likely your own home campaign has a better story than the first Dungeons and Dragons movie. The reasons are numerous and detailed below.

The story begins with the main antagonist, Mage Profion (played by Jeremy Irons), attempting to make a rod that controls red dragons. He needs it specifically to challenge the empress, Savnia (Thora Birch), as she has a rod to control gold dragons. When his efforts fail, he starts two plots in motion. The first one is to steal a map that would eventually lead him to a completed rod. He sends his right-hand man, Damodar (Bruce Payne), to handle that. The second plan is to use his own political influence to force the empress to give up her rod, which he attends to himself. Meanwhile, the empress wants to give rights to commoners out of moral compassion. Currently, magicians are first class citizens while everybody else is second class. You’d might expect Savina to be the main character, but no, she is not. The main characters are Ridley (Justin Whalin) and Snails (Marlon Wayans). Both are thieves who decide the fast track to a better life is to steal from a mage school. They just so happen to break in while Damodar is looking for the scroll. They then make an escape with a lowly assistant mage, Marina (Zoe MacLellan), and stumble upon a surly dwarf just sitting in some garbage. I don’t actually remember hearing the dwarf’s name, but apparently it’s Elwood (Lee Arenberg). In the interest of not going into too many spoilers, I won’t divulge too much of what else happens. Not that it matters too much, though. The movie starts strong enough, lulls after the middle, and wants to have an epic climax, but is ultimately boring. This is only partially due to the atrocious CGI. It looks closer to a made-for-TV movie in that regard. The practical effects at least look like effort was put into them. The sets are passable, if not good. You can tell they had fun with the dungeons and traps because of the quality and thought shines through. That’s about where the positives end.

The negatives of this movie give me mixed feelings. They really wanted an epic, sweeping story about low class and high class citizens setting their differences aside to bring about equality. Too much, in fact. The story is too split between the empress, villains, and Ridley and his sidekicks. It needed more focus on the main party and less focus on the longwinded, self-righteous speeches of the empress and Profion. It wastes an entire five to ten minutes that could probably have been used on Marina and Elwood. Those two needed it, because they’re basically useless. The most interesting characters are Damodar, Profion, and Snails. Profion might be a menacing villain, but when Damodar actually did something right, Profion honored the bargain they made. He’s evil, but he’s at least somewhat trustworthy. Damodar is a man of few words and stern countenance. Snails is utterly cowardly, mildly amusing, but still loyal to his friends when it counts. Ridley and Marina’s contentious relationship about high class and low class people getting along is tedious at best and frustrating at worst. It just feels childish. It would have been better if each had been trying to prove their skills were useful or better than the others. Then they slowly started learning and using each other’s skills (or tactics, at least), then that could have given them a proper chance to shine and emphasize the point that non-magical and magical skills are both approximately equal. But they didn’t do that. To make matters worse, the acting is all over the place. To their credit, everyone seems like they’re giving it their all. Jeremy Irons’ performance as Profion was the best. He hams it up, going from personable politician to half-mad maniac very well. Bruce Payne portrays the cold pain of Damodar adequately. Marlon Wayans seems like he was basically being himself, just cowardly. Which draws attention to the next issues: the dialog. None of the lines are written naturally and it hurts the rest of the actors’ performances. It’s an issues with the Star War prequels. Many of the actors just aren’t comfortable saying their lines, so they come across as wooden and stilted. They try so hard to take it seriously, though! However, you can only do so much with what you’re given. But the worst offense of all is the bland, uninspiring musical scores. It is the most generic garbage you have ever heard (so far) and be thankful you’ll forget about it after it’s over. In one ear and out the other.

With this many flaws, can anyone honestly say this is a good movie? No. This is a pretty bad movie. Is the Dungeons and Dragons movie a good guilty pleasure? Yes. Nobody remembers the phrase “guilty pleasure” anymore. A movie doesn’t have to be good for you to like it. Look at its flaws and think about if you were entertained. If you find yourself rewatching it, despite being bad, you probably have a guilty pleasure. That’s fine. So what do I rate the movie overall? A D+, or a C- if I’m being generous. It’s a perfectly harmless flick to watch on a rainy day or to have as background noise. Enjoy it however you like, because I’ve seen fit to spare it from my cutting words.

-The Clark Side

Playing to the Hilt: Tieflings

Tieflings. You can call them “planetouched,” you can call them “demi-humans,” but nowadays, they’re presented (by many players) as “mega-angst devil-teen super-emo edgelords.” All too often, a player sees only the superficial features of being a tiefling. Ironically, it’s more tragic than their own tragic backstories. This leads some folks to balk at even allowing them at their tables. With such a reputation, why would they? However, tieflings are far more than that. This post will teach you the real meaning behind being a tiefling. With it, you’ll turn reactions from “Ugh, you’re a tiefling?” into “Ooh, you’re a tiefling!” Because if you’re not killing it, then you’re not playing it to the hilt.

First and foremost, tieflings do lend themselves quite well to the edgy loner and we’ll delve into that a bit later. For now, however, we need to dispel that as the primary way of playing them. Before Hellboy, before Dungeons and Dragons, before even Lord of the Rings, way, way back, in the middle ages was a clergyman who loved old Arthurian legends. Geoffrey of Monmouth knew it would be a hard sell to convince his fellows that this wasn’t a satanic story of pagan magic and godless idol worship. So, he made Merlin a half-demon who was immediately baptized and freed from satanic influences while still keeping all his power. The church approved of the adaptation and the Arthurian legends were updated. Merlin has never brooded over being a tiefling, he’s never resented the church for its intervention, he’s not lurked in the shadows pointlessly. He is one of the first examples of a tiefling and his alignment was most certainly not evil. He embodies the life we can all strive for in overcoming the circumstances we’ve been dealt. Recognizing that you are broken, as a tiefling, is an important realization. Even if you aren’t evil yourself, you’ve been touched by it. With Merlin himself as an example, it is more than plausible to aim to be good. It’s okay and a welcome change of pace. You may, however, have to be good in your own ways. Tieflings are still surrounded by superstition, meaning others will be apprehensive towards your help. To play around this, try donating anonymously to a temple or orphanage. Having a governmental position is okay, but being a part of an active (good-aligned) church will work towards improving your reputation. Make no mistake, despite your best efforts, there will be some who won’t totally accept you no matter what you do, but it is important not to fault them for feeling that way. You could also wear a number of holy symbols of different good deities, wear lucky horse shoes or rabbits feet, and maintain a garden of clovers (in the hopes you get a four-leaf clover) to put superstitious folks at ease. At the most extreme, you might file down your horns. So long as you’re expressing the backflipping and hoop-jumping you’re doing to fit in (and not simply telling people about it), you’re doing well.

Next, let’s cover the opposite end of the spectrum. The truth is, it is very easy to succumb to villainy or anti-heroism as a tiefling. It’s entirely possible you were shunned by an ignorant community, “exorcised” by an overprotective priest, or suspected of crimes you didn’t commit. Most of it is undeserved. These people are often trying to protect themselves from very real fiendish threats, but they don’t realize you aren’t necessarily a part of that. It makes it even more tragic, as you could have set yourself against these demons and devils. But the push for your expulsion has been the very thing to push you into villainy. Regardless of the avenue your character takes, he was shoved there by the whole world. Ran out of town for the upmteenth time? Now you need to sneak around to stay safe, now you’re getting into lockpicking, now you’re a rogue stealing from the wealthy and poor alike. And who better to start with than those who ran you out. Rich or poor? It doesn’t matter. Vengeance (and their money) is yours. Excommunicated from the church? That’s music to a fiend’s ears. Now you hear ominous offers on moonless nights, now you barter for the power to move ahead, now you’re a warlock with a grudge for hypocrites and not even your soul left to lose. Wrongly accused of crimes? Now you have to negotiate, now you have to spin yarns and tall tales convincingly because they won’t accept the truth, now you’re a bard talking your way out of anything and everything and setting legal precedents along the way. Down and down the spiral goes. The key is to decide your limits. Your party will be opposed to your villainous antics, so when you decide what folks have wronged you, choose people that are likely to be enemies of the party already. Work with other players on this. For example, if the clergy wronged you, you might propose that your cleric or paladin suspects corruption in the church and you’re working together to identify those individuals, but only on the condition that you get to render your own bloody revenge when you find the culprits. Ask about the party’s backgrounds too if their classes aren’t doing much for you. The possibilities go on and on. As for the general attitude, by no means should you refuse to work with the party, that’s the point of linking your backstory with someone else’s. When the group is ready to go, you need a reason to go with them, so stop brooding in the shadows all the time. Instead, speak minimally, saying only what you need to, but not necessarily simply. You want the impression of pragmatism from years of a hard life, not the broken dialog of a neanderthal “who no talk big.” Including your tail in your descriptions helps too. Keep in mind how dogs and cats use their tails. If an idea sounds good to you, you might say “Fine, I’ll play along” but your tail’s wagging betrays your real mood. Similarly, you could be sneaking down a hallway and your tail gently sways to and fro, helping you balance.

Lastly, the core of the tiefling. Every tiefling is set apart by the unholy power flowing through their veins. You may not feel this darkness all the time, but it might be especially noticeable in the presence of holy symbols and sites. You could describe yourself as wincing in their presence or it could simply be a sense of tension like a headache. The power itself takes the form of your innate magic. The initial spells you get, assuming 5th Edition D&D, are effectively parlor tricks, but they bely your sinister nature as you make doors open on their own or will the ground to start shaking. A more experienced tiefling unlocks a retaliating gout of flame and magical darkness to cover his escapes. These are the real expressions of your power. Infrequently describe the hits you take, saying embers spark across your head and arms. This should allude to your fiery wrath. Speaking of flames, fire isn’t nearly as frightening to a creature of Hell and this holds true for you. Since you resist fire damage, you can play into that. Snuff out torches, candles, or even campfires with your bare hands. Your magical darkness is a tad more difficult to incorporate, but it should be no problem to say shadows sometimes tilt towards you of their own accord. This makes you spooky and ominous. As with all other things, don’t overdo it.

Tieflings are far more flexible than most give them credit. Their ancient legacy spans from the middle ages itself and deserves its place in Dungeons and Dragons as a playable option. To those players, don’t strain tensions with bad habits. It does a disservice to us all, including the tieflings themselves, to reduce them down to a mere trope. Consider being good, consider being a team player bad guy, and consider the actual mindset of someone who inadvertently houses evil. Because if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing to the hilt.

-The Clark Side

Playing to the Hilt: Dragonborn

Classical fantasy races have withstood the test of time. They’re staples of the genre and beloved by all. However, sometimes, you need something a little bit different. The game is called Dungeons and Dragons, but dragons themselves are rarely seen. What better way to play up the title (and do something new) than a unique race specifically to this game? Enter the dragonborn. The previous races, especially the peculiar elves, have all been distinct, but were much more approximate to humans. Dragonborn, on the other hand, aren’t even half human. They’re their own race, unrelated to human beings. But new things face an uphill battle, especially for being so inhuman. How can these things stand beside the icons of elves, dwarves, and halflings? Surely the dragonborn are only a cheap cash grab and a watered down dragon, right? By the end of this article, you’ll think again and dragonborn will be on the map. Because if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing to the hilt.

Starting from the beginning, dragonborn were made, like most other races, by their gods. One account tells of them springing from the divine blood of Io as he was severed into Bahamut and Tiamat. Older lore makes them originally another race, but blessed by Bahamut into a wholly new draconic form to better serve them. In any event, the divine plays a major role in the life of most dragonborn. Regardless of their walk of life or what their strengths are, their choice of deity will guide their decisions. The vast majority of dragonborn pick either Bahamut, a dragon god of justice and mercy, or Tiamat, a dragon goddess of greed and vengeance. Though, most dragonborn favor Bahamut. In either case, you trust the divine. The suggests for playing up a dwarf’s faith in Moradin can work here, but that’s the easy way out. A dragonborn’s praises should be brief, but longer than a simple exclamation. A classic example is “may the force be with you” or “God bless you.” Thinking of it in terms of a motto might also help. “May justice be your guard” or “Let mercy hold you” are fine sayings for following Bahamut. “May plunder be your power” or “Let vengeance have its due” are fine sayings for following Tiamat.

Stemming from both their love of Bahamut and their own inclinations, dragonborn have a distinct sense of honor. Honor is valued nearly as high as following Bahamut himself. Honor is how you conduct yourself with discipline. Honor is reverence and how you are revered. Honor is a way of life. Honorless dragonborn are tragedies, but unrepentantly dishonorable dragonborn are despicable. As such, any dragonborn worth his salt strives to bring honor to himself and his clan. To represent this, you might become a master craftsman and give out some of your works as gifts to warriors or nobility. You may teach the basics of your craft to youngsters willing to listen, encouraging another generation to flourish. An honorable quest might be to slay an unrepentantly honorless dragonborn or offer a dishonored dragonborn a chance at redemption. You yourself might have been dishonorable and you seek to regain it! Maybe you lost it by indulging in your vices or totally by accident. Everyone loves a good redemption story.

Knowing the mindset and values of a dragonborn is one thing. Knowing how they feel is different. What it feels like to be a dragonborn isn’t purely a matter of piety. A major source is the small spark of power dwelling within them, a power unmistakably draconic. You breath fire. No extensive training necessary, no special knowledge, only a little bit of practice, like when toddlers learn to walk. Even so, it’s a double-edged sword. You are always dangerous. A careless sneeze or cough is all it’d take to accidentally scorch a building and end lives. It is a sobering responsibility, one that finds comfort in discipline and utility. To showcase this, you might hold your nose in dusty dungeons or meadows, insist on sleeping without a feathered mattress or pillow, and try to stay near a window to safely sneeze in.

Though they aren’t a typical fantasy race, dragonborn have all the depth and complexities as other races. With destructive power firmly in their blood, they have forged themselves into a people dedicated to honor and their deities. All three are fundamental to their existence and brings a distinct sense to the table. So when you make a character, and flip to the dragonborn, think back to this post. Because if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing to the hilt.

-The Clark Side

Playing to the Hilt: Half-orcs

Brutal, barbaric, brash, stupid, slow, sickening. All common feelings folks might have for a half-orc. Likewise, a player might turn their nose up at being so pigeonholed. Who wants to just be a dumb brute? But does something like a half-orc deserve this reputation? Does it have merit? Surely a mix of man and orc can only produce a lesser human and be nothing as deep as a half-elf, right? This post will dispel such notions, and by the end, you’ll be itching to give them a chance. Get ready to be schooled. Because if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing it to the hilt.

Half-orcs have a sordid history, both in-game and out. Their initial implications were that they were the result of very “aggressive affection” between an orc and a human. More sensitive people might reject them on that alone, as would many people in-game. That needn’t be the case. Orcs are aggressive as a people. Their wicked impulses and need to destroy is powerful and while they are known for dull wits, they aren’t completely stupid. They have a language all their own, they have rites and rituals to follow their deity (Gruumsh, who you might also revere), and a tribal structure. What this means is, when humans tribes interact with orcish ones, an alliance is not impossible. They have the sense to know that strong parents make for strong children. With few exceptions, an orc is willing to breed with just about anything. Likewise, Humans might see it as an opportunity to gain something just as strong as an orc, but with more levelheadedness. Regardless of the manner your orc came to be, the means of your birth will hang over your head, even if it was under consensual conditions. Unlike with a half-elf, you’re a stark reminder of the dangers in the wilderness. Civilized folk might not say it to your face, but their nervousness and unwillingness to make eye contact tells you everything anyway. This can paint your world with a shade of loneliness that’s different from a half-elf’s. At least for them, the humans might be more accepting of them. For you, they just don’t want you there, or worse still, they wish you were dead or not even born to begin with. Expressing this is relatively easy. You are weighed down by the negativity you’ve endured all your life, but while you don’t let it stop you, you are still burnt out and exhausted. Speaking in a gruff, monotone manner, along with some exasperated sighs when things get more troublesome, gets the message across. You are at risk of sounding like an angsty teenager, but practice makes perfect. Although, if you were raised more among the uncivilized tribes, you might be quite the opposite, right? Your strength might be lauded by your human family and friends. Unfortunately, with the orcs you’re scrutinized a bit more. Oh, they’ll accept you alright, IF you’re as strong as they are or stronger. Throughout a year, younger orcs will interrupt your day for a challenge of some sort and if you want to save face, you must take them on. In either event, you can be left exhausted from conflict, so the previous advice on exhaustion stands, but you might be overjoyed at each challenge. Either way, you might adventure just to escape this type of nonsense. But before moving on, if you want to play to the hero of the tribe, you’re much more likely to have a “tough guy” attitude. Strength has garnered you praise and it fixes your problems, so judging others similarly is almost a forgone conclusion. During interactions, ice-breaker questions might be, “So… how much do you lift?” or you might make a friendly wager over arm wrestling with the loser buying the winner drinks. As with everything else. Don’t overdo it, but enjoy pretending to be a meat head.

Next, we discuss what really drives the heart of every half-orc. After all, if they experience the conflict of being part human and part orc, what’s the upside? Sheer. Physical. Might. They don’t have the running power native to orcs. They don’t have the versatility of humans. They have the happy, murderous middle ground of sheer. Physical. Might. That endurance for running of an orc might be diminished, but the human spirit repurposes and transforms it. No pure orc can be nearly as savage as a half-orc can with a weapon in their hands. No pure orc can suffer the damage a half-orc can and keep on fighting. No normal human can easily reach your levels of strength. The downside (and upside) of this is you can be, and probably are, much more reckless than others. A halfling might be brave in the face of unknown danger, but your overconfidence says, “there’s no danger that you can’t handle.” A fun way to play into this is to be the guy to stand up to a hulking monster (though I don’t recommend being too reckless if you don’t want to die.) If you do end up dropping, but not dying, you can boast that you still won, claiming that he couldn’t even beat you in one hit, so he was clearly weak. In the very least, you got some battle scars out of it. In fact, the more scars you have, the better. Each one is a story in its own right, each one is a testament to your stamina. Make up a few short stories to tell, or at least have the details in mind for your scars. Scars over the eye are always striking. Perhaps you have one or two scars over the bridge of your nose. Do you hide one you got from, say, falling off a horse? Do you lie about how you got it? It’s hard to go wrong about how things went south.

Regardless, such a tense life isn’t easy to cope with. Often times, it can feel like a lose-lose scenario, even if you are the victor in your tribe or you make your strength useful in a city. The constant need to prove yourself of being either a monster or a man can eventually break ever a hearty half-orc. Who can he visit to not only escape, not only live “respectably”, but also funnel that fury inside? Gruumsh. Gruumsh, for better or worse, offers that outlet. He delights in the success of all his children and whether a half-orc knows it or not, they can sense his influence. If they heed it, they may soon find themselves in the presence of orcs, half-orcs, and other followers of Gruumsh. Unlike in a strictly orcish tribe, the need to prove one’s strength might be more formal, even for such a chaotic deity. Weakness is to be culled indeed, but instead of totally random surprise attacks, the challenges might be to slay or capture a notoriously strong beast, elf, dwarf, or human, to win in a gladiatorial arena, or to dominate a tribe of other creatures. It you chose to hunt an elf or dwarf, it may be more amicable to the party to aim for drow or duergar. This is a slight cop out, because the goodly elves and dwarves are Gruumsh’s enemies, but drow and duergar tend to be more dangerous and therefore worthy tests of strength. Participating in a gladiatorial arena is a bit of a tall order on your Dungeon Master, but if the rest of the party is interested, he should have no problem working something into the campaign. Finally, targeting a tribe for subjugation, or better still, conversion, is best done with an aimlessly evil tribe of marauders or bandits. Your good aligned party members won’t necessarily object to slaying such degenerates, so rounding up the survivors to serve your temple won’t be especially challenging. If your party needs convincing, suggest they’d be more useful later and that’s the best place for them to stay. After all, it’s worked wonders for you!

Turmoil, both inside and out, mighty strength stemming from reckless wrath, and an uneasy ally in the divine gives half-orcs far more depth and drama than meets the eye. Their complicated lives make for an excellent expression of an enduring hero who is burnt out or the local legend living large. Think back to this article when you consider a half-orc character. It just might bring out an unforgettable character. Because if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing it to the hilt.

-The Clark Side

Playing to the Hilt: Half-elves

With so many fantasy races to play, you can often feel conflicted about which one to be. Sometimes you want the grace and power of an elf, but with a little more flexibility, a little more human. Sometimes you want the endless possibilities that comes with humanity, but just a little more specialized and exotic. Enter, then, the half-elf. Now, to be clear, being a jack-of-all-trades and a master of none isn’t usually a strong quality. It can be helpful sure, but more often than not, it’s better to be one thing or another. What would make a half-elf any better? By the end of this post, you’ll know the core in’s and out’s of being a half-elf and how to really shine at the table. Because, if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing it to the hilt.

Elf characters can have a strange mindset to adapt to, so starting from there and dialing it down should make for a pretty good half-elf, right? You could, but there’s much more to delve into. Elves are still distantly foreign to you, but more so than any other race, you can relate to them… to an extent. For you, time isn’t as much of a commodity as it is for a human. You can afford to wait for seasonal events and elvish celebrations that might come around every 50 years. However, by the same measure, it is literally a fraction of the life of an elf. That will always loom over you if you were predominantly raised among elves. What’s more (depending on the lore), you matured at a much faster rate than your peers, who were likely still children when you were becoming an adult. In their eyes, you might be a child still, one doomed to whither away under the weight of Father Time, just more slowly. Likewise, if you were born among humans, this is the very same feeling you might have about them. You might mature at their rate, but you’ll live to see generations come and go before meeting a (presumably) natural end. You are a person caught between two worlds and in some ways experiencing the worst of both. You might be nervous around elves, stuttering your dialog a bit to represent the reminder of your conflicting nature. It’d be easy to be morbid about it, were it not for when your mixed heritage shines. Because of these sentiments, you have a fundamental motivation for both avoiding them with wanderlust and adventure and a deep seated desire to bring people together. Many half-elves may play into one or the other, being an explorer or a town leader. But to bring out the true conflict of your heritage, aim to bring out both. Taking the attitude of diplomat is a tremendously good start. Look for conflicts that can be avoided with negotiations, especially if they’re about to boil over. Success would be great, but don’t worry about actually succeeding in resolving a dispute with negotiation. Your goal is to show you aim for an accord. If you fail, you can later (briefly) lament the fact you couldn’t resolve it. If you succeed, you can express your relief instead.

While the conflict they feel is real, their dual nature isn’t constantly at odds with itself. Humans are ambitious and elves delight in artistry. The combination of the two makes you jump at the chance to master a number of new skills. By a human standard, you might seem to dabble, but in truth, your elven artistry propels you to become adept at whatever things you put your mind to. Scholarly higher education? Wilderness survival? Locksmithing? Social skills? Athleticism? Your efforts push you to be a jack-of-many-trades and master of several. Whatever skills you acquire this way, research jargon related to it and sparingly use it in your speech. This should be plenty to relay your excitement at learning a new art.

Despite your best efforts, you simply cannot defy your biology. If you can’t stay with humans for long and can’t be peers with elves, what course of action is left to you? Your wandering means you’ve met a broad range of species. Is that the answer? You’ve likely bartered with dwarves, eaten with halflings, marveled at gnomish wonders, and more. You may be hard pressed to find a people, but for now, take great solace in being a people person. Don’t you? You’ll heed the need to arbitrate, you’ll wander from place to place, but they won’t truly be what you need: a place to belong. Only one thing can relate to you wholly and completely: another half-elf. A personal quest is a powerful motivator. The more personal it is, the more meaning to it. When playing a half-elf, it might very well be a character defining moment to finally, at long last, run across another half-elf. Though this depends on the setting you play in, in general, half-elves are rare. Consider, at some point in your half-elf’s career, making it your personal goal to find other half-elves. While it will surely be sad if nothing comes of it, to express this sentiment let’s that half-elfish conflict and unification really shine through. And all in one package to boot.

Half-elves are not at all as simple or plain as you’d might be lead to believe. By their very nature, they’re conflicted, whole, and alone all at the same time. It’d be enough to weigh on many a person, but a half-elf isn’t a normal person by default. Take this opportunity, the next time you make a character. When you pick half-elf, remember this advice. Because if you’re not killing it, you’re not playing it to the hilt.

-The Clark Side